"If you've seen one child with autism, you've seen one child with autism." As a parent of two on the spectrum, I could not agree with this more. There is a certain loss that often feels irretrievable when first faced with a diagnosis. Shortly after being given two diagnoses back to back, I came to realization that I was given the opportunity to understand an enigma and parent in an extraordinary way.
The challenges I faced at the beginning of this journey for both of my boys were equally overwhelming. Nevertheless, the distinction between my boys remained apparent from day one. I admit, before I was able to fully accept my blessing, hope was not always there. I often heard that Early Intervention worked wonders on children who were diagnosed at an early age, and I eagerly expected rapid results. It is difficult to watch your child exhibit mannerisms that no longer seem "cute", but rather harmful. After a year or two with hardly any progression, what little hope a newly diagnosed parent builds begins to fade.
When my older son began to blossom into what is commonly referred to as "high functioning", I naively assumed his brother would follow in his footsteps. Along with a high-functioning child come amazing qualities and little quirks (echolalia, perfectionism, etc.) that I embrace in my son whole-heartedly. However, along with a low-functioning child come violent self-stimulatory and self-injurious behaviors, with little to no communication or self-help abilities.
As challenged parents we are in tune with our frustrations, as I'm sure our children are as well; after all, how often do are we faced with the screeching sounds of frustration from a fierce yet angelic child who just can't find it in them to say "mommy".
College Point, NY